Hmmm… usually when I start out saying I don’t have much to say, I end up saying quite a bit. I suppose because I start writing and rambling on and suddenly discover all these thoughts I didn’t know were there.

I am beginning to get excited by new work opportunity. Don’t want to go into a whole lot of detail just yet. Suffice to say I am studying, training, and step one is to be licensed by the State… I sit for my test on Thursday morning. Weird… never thought I would be someone with a license to sell life insurance… but it is a means to an end, so I don’t mind. It’s been a real eye-opener too. I’ve been learning a lot about the world of finance.

I keep looking for other positions to apply for in the meanwhile, but nothing seems to show up. Michigan is one economically depressed state!

Times like this I need to keep my eyes super focused on what is really important, and to remember that God is faithful. He has promised to meet our needs… and I look forward to seeing how He does it this time, so that I can share with you all just how faithful He has been.

Sometimes I find myself thinking about life like the scenes in a movie. The protagonist goes through their part of the story. Then, for a few moments the camera moves to show the viewers what the protagonist cannot and does not know. We the viewers know and keep wondering when the protagonist will find out…

I am living the scenes of my life. Unlike the movies, I have read the end of the story. I KNOW what God has promised. In a way, I am the viewer and the protagonist. But I cannot see the fine details. I do not see the hand of God moving in an unknown area of my life, in the life a person I have not yet met, or in the hearts of people I may never meet, all to bring about His answer to the needs in my life and the lives of those I love.

But His hand is moving, of this I am certain.

Something I really look forward to is when I will be in eternity. I will be able to ask my Savior to show me what was really happening during these times of frustration, and struggle, and inner battling. And He will show me. And I will have a deeper awe and gratitude for my creator than I will have had before I knew.

And in the meantime, I am learning to wait…

So now I’m wondering, if the sun is shining and its snowing, shouldn’t there be a rainbow?

Perhaps in my heart…

Seeing the poster, “Attitude is Everything” has always been interesting to me. I have realized it intellectually. But these past few days, I’m realizing it in a newer way – in reality. I talked with a friend of mine in Israel this morning. I needed to get some professional info from her. As we wound up the talk she said, “we are all very concerned about your situation.”

I think I surprised her–I know I surprised me with my response. I told her, “If it was only Rich and I, you should be concerned. But rather, be concerned for America. Compared to many others, he and I are doing well. At least I’m training for a new job. At least we have no credit card debt.”

And I shared with her things I’ve been learning. How a colleague wrote and mentioned that he was laid off, and they are at the end of their savings. He can’t find work. Now what does he do? Our Pastor urged members to give to the benevolent fund in our church. It has gone dry from helping others. In fact, when I first lost work the Pastor asked if we needed help. Rich and I told him, “Not yet. We still have some savings…”

The mortgage company’s offer of help is laughable. They are willing to let us miss a few payments (they have to evaluate how many). Then we have to begin repaying the mortgage PLUS the missed payments within a defined amount of time. So we can just have a bit of relief now, to experience major stress later. Rich and I will apply, if for no reason than to be able to document the whole experience. Can you believe it? The bank calls the place where we have to apply, “Hope Department.”

Sorry Countrywide Insurance. That is not hope. You were given millions of dollars to help you clients, but instead, you are buying small banks, and offering to help others in a way that makes sure that they pay for any so-called “help” you give. That is not hope and that is not help. That is taking advantage of desperate people in desperate times.

O thank GOD, that my GOD is the God of the universe. And that is where attitude comes in. As I’ve considered everything that has happened since I met Rich and we married, I realize that God has answered my prayer. I knew I needed stretched in so many areas of my life. I was tired of being alone. Through our marriage, God has been showing me so much. So much where I need to ask His forgiveness, so much where I need to grow, so much about HIS power in our weakness.

This posting is my public Valentine’s Day present, a few days early, to my husband. I am so not sorry that we got married. I am so not sorry that I am here. I am so very grateful to God for all He is doing in our lives. Are we struggling? Yes. Do we get discouraged? Yes. Does it hurt? O yes. Are there tears? Definitely.

BUT God is greater than all of this. He is with us through the struggles and through the trials. He has promised to meet our needs, not our wants. In His graciousness, He gives so much more than we realize.

And how can Rich and I encourage others who are struggling, if we have not faced those struggles. I don’t want an intellectual exercise. I want reality. And God is giving us reality.

So what is going to happen? I don’t know. I do know that we have enough for today. And isn’t that what Jesus told us? “Take no thought for tomorrow. Tomorrow will take care of itself. Today has enough concerns of its own…”

Today, I have to finish up this posting. Today, I have some work on a small project to do. Today, I need to do the dishes. Today, I need to wrap some gifts. Today, I need to prepare for my class which begins in a few hours. Today, I am thankful to my God that He is God and I am not. That He is the one who is truly in charge and in control. And I am thankful for the life He has given me, here in Michigan with my husband and his kids (my step-kids).

P.S. For those of you who are interested. I just put up a new page about how Rich and I met. We wrote it together. Enjoy.

I call it nothing short of a miracle… went to a job interview this afternoon with another head hunting agency. After the interview I went to get my car keys–no keys! I looked everywhere, not in handbag, not in my coat…

I looked out the window. My car was still parked on the street. Went down to the car, got in–no keys. I emptied my bag again and looked. No keys.

I got out of the car and looked under, around, at the place machine where I put the coins in to pay for the parking. No keys.

Finally, I turned and leand on the hood of the car, trying to figure this out, and looked down.

The car keys were laying on the windshield just above the windshield wipers… I had been in the interview for over an hour. There had been a lot of people walking by. My car was still there! I call that a miracle. Thankyou Lord for protecting our car!

I was reading the news this morning, and realized that today is election day in Israel. I do not know how things will turn out. I find it rather disconcerting that one of the major players, Bibi Netanyahu, is up for consideration. How could he even be a part of the game? The country already gave him one vote of no confidence.

As I look at what is happening in Israel, I realize that they are suffering from the same problem so many are suffering from. The lack of true leadership. In today’s world, it seems like all of the leaders have their own agenda. Ceratinly the best good of a nation and her people is only a buzz word. Today’s world, and perhaps it has almost always been that way, has been about power and control.

Yet control is elusive. A figment of our imaginations. So quickly everything spins out of control. Then what.

I love my people, Israel. I love my nation, Israel. I love my people in the US. I love my nation the US. A citizen of both nations, I am deeply concerned for both.

In Israel, there is rarely a comprehension of why they really exist. I remember asking a soldier once, after he told me he did not believe in God, and that Abraham was a myth, “Then what are you fighting for? If the Jewish people are based on a myth, and God did not make a covenant with Abraham, why are you Jewish? Everything you are fighting for is based on a lie.”

He looked shocked… and admitted he had never considered that perspective before. Israel IS REAL — and Israel is so closely intertwined with God’s plan for this world that it is too awesome for words. But as was written in the prophets:

…My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge (Hosea 4:6)

And so now, elections come, and again, the hope is in a new, god-less leader, and not in the God who made a covenenant with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.

Elections came in America. I knew of many Christians who but their hope in President Obama.

God’s people perish for lack of knowledge. We have let ourselves think that the worlds solutions are the solutions that God’s people can live with. But they are not.

The same word for Israel applies to America:

“If my people, which are called by MY name, will humble themselves and pray.. then will I hear from heaven… and heal their land.”

O Israel, O America, return to the God of Creation, the one true God.

May the results of the elections not be the beginning of judgement for our rebellion, but a beginning of hope because we have repented and turned to Him.