It’s been an interesting past couple of weeks. I honestly didn’t know how we were going to pay the mortgage for February, and then my dear hubbie got a quite unexpected gift that covered it. A week later I got another contract for some work, of all places, in Australia. And today I received notification that I have received a grant that paid for my professional membership in the Society for Technical Communication. I’ve also gotten an opportunity to do some writing for an online news/entertainment site focusing on Grand Rapids. I will have my own section focusing only on Technical Writing. It won’t pay at first, but there is potential. I’ll keep you posted there.

Well, other than it being weird having conference calls at night so I can talk with people in the day time tomorrow, the new work is good. Don’t know what will be next, but it sure is interesting.

The girls are out with friends, Rich is reading, and the house is quiet. It is windy and cold outside, but at least we aren’t getting the snow they are getting in DC. So that is all for now!

A Bible verse that spoke to me in a new way recently was in I John 4:18-19

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. We love, because He first loved us.

As I read that verse I also thought about how I am comforted by the humanity of Jesus, as well as His divinity. If He had been only divine, I would be totally undone. But Jesus was also fully human. He knew what it was like to hurt, to be lonely, and to be assailed by fear. But He never sinned by giving in to those things. And because He felt and experienced those things, He is able also to be merciful to me.

Lately I’ve been so assailed by fear. But as I read and reread that verse in I John, I realized that I am forgetting God’s great love for me. God does not punish His children… He does discipline them. But those are huge differences, like the difference between repentance and penance. Repentance turns away from a sin knowing there is no way it can ever be made right; penance keeps looking at the sin and tries to make things right… but can never succeed.

As I looked at bills, the lack of writing contracts, my husband’s health, and times when I so wish I could be an encouragement to our girls but feeling shut out… I realized I was beginning to yield to fear. As I look at that verse again right now, I realize how much fear robs me, not just of my peace, but of my relationships. Who wants to relate to a fearful person? How can I truly love others when I am filled with fear?

And so I’ve been continuing the battle to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus, the author and finisher of my faith. Has everything changed? No. But there have been answers to prayer. Rich received a birthday greeting with a check in it: our mortgage is covered for another month. We will be able to pay the taxes. I got another small contract with an Israeli company in California, and have another contract pending with a business in Australia. Sadly one of the girls new calves died… I am doubly sad because I don’t know how to help them other than to just be here. Rich is still struggling with his health but we had a good meeting yesterday with a diabetes specialist who had several suggestions and actual supplies to help him.

Life will always have its ups and downs. But I am so thankful for Jesus, walking with me, mercifully guiding and leading, every step of the way.

Or: Thoughts on Life in America as We Enter 2010

I am involved in a different discussion groups. Someone was wondering why people are so upset about the health care reform bill… and so I responded. I thought, hey, this is important to me, and so I decided to post this on my blog as well. A different perspective, I hope… that will help others to consider where America is headed in the coming years.

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I believe that if the Health Care bill passes the damage done to our country could be irreparable, unless 2010 allows election of people who can reverse the damage. I worked for 20 years in biomedical and then medical device industry. Currently I am an independent contractor with no health insurance – but I would prefer no health insurance to Obama-surance.

I agree that there are problems with health care – but there are other problems that feed into it. For example, Americans are “sue happy”. This means they sue for everything, including crazy bogus stuff that should never have been allowed in our courts. So much of health costs today are related to this. The insurance that physicians have to pay is outrageous. I agree, some cases are factual, but the majority of this stuff is just plain “butt covering.” In fact, when documenting medical devices, I’ve had to put in the most ridiculous text, all to protect ourselves from somebody who is not working with their head screwed on straight.

Taxes imposed by the health bill will kill our country. Small business will go out of business and big businesses will be negatively impacted. I lived overseas for 25 years. When I returned to the US I was stunned to see how so many people here in the US seem to think the government needs to take care of “we the people” instead of “we the people” taking care of each other.

There needs to be a huge shift in mentality for things to really change. The bottom line can no longer be the almighty dollar. We need to re-evaluate what a reasonable profit is – and this includes the executives who collect huge salaries at the expense of a company.

I am watching the country of my birth move from a truly free and democratic society to one that is riddled with political correctness and laws the seem to point, not towards socialism but communism. I never dreamed I’d see the day when we are giving up our rights so quickly. We are letting the government mandate everything from the TV waves and light bulbs, to our medical care. I have some friends from communist China who moved to Canada. I did not tell them I was against what is happening here. They asked what some of the laws that have been passed will do. I told them – they were horrified. They said, this is terrible, why are the Americans giving up their freedom?

What this country needed, and still needs, is not “change” but a return to our original standards and the constitution. I remember when I was in school learning that it is important to read our Constitution with the understanding of “original intent”. This is no longer the case.

Separation of church and state NEVER meant that I cannot say “In God we trust.” It never meant a county or town can’t have a manger scene on the lawn. It has always meant though, that while we can have the manger scene, I won’t force YOU to have a manger scene. Now it means we can have everything except the manger scene.

What does this have to do with the discussion? Don’t we understand and learn from the past? Look at what happened to the “intellectuals” in China and Communist Russia. The Medical Device industry and other hi-tech industries will suffer more and more as each and every discovery is weighed and judged by a party line that focuses on expediency rather than sanctity of life.

When I worked in China I was horrified to see how cheap life is there. I could tell you stories…. I have friends from Russia who have told me about the way life used to be, I have friends from China who tell me how life is there… and now, here we are in America, deceived by smooth speaking politicians and a political correctness that will correct us out of our freedom and the life that so many valuable men and women have given their life to preserve.

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I ended my post there. But for those of you, my friends and colleagues who know me well, I’d like to add this. In truth, I believe the only hope for America is that those who call themselves Christians really be Christians. We need to pray for our country as never before and beg God for His mercy on our country. America is no longer a Christian country. I remember reading Corrie Ten Boom’s account of her experience in the Holocost. She once asked her father, “Pappa, why are Christians turning the Jews in to the Nazis?” He responded, “Corrie, just because a mouse is in a cookie jar does not make it a cookie.”

As I look at what is going on here in the US, I am convinced that the the cookie jar is filled with mice, and the tragedy is, most of the mice think of themselves as cookies. There still are cookies in the cookie jar… I am so thankful for that. May this coming year be one where God’s people seek His face as never before. Maranatha…

Well it took long enough… I finaly got some repairs done to this site and it is now runing as desired. So not I can add content…

But I do have something to praise the Lord for. I am sure you will rejoice with us. Rich called me this afternoon while he was out doing some errands (I was home working). He had gone to the hospital to make a payment on the stress test he took several months ago. He had gone to pay in person because they wanted to talk to him. When he got there, they would not accept the payment. They had reviewed our paperwork and decided that we really could not afford the test, and would cover it from other sources. In other words, a $1900 debt has been cancelled.

We are so thankful to the Lord for this grace towards us! A recruiter called me today, and perhaps something will turn up. I don’t know. Mixed feelings about driving over an hour every day for new work, but if the salary is reasonable… we shall see. For now, I have a couple of small jobs at home for which I’m thankful.

Well, this is my third Thanksgiving in Michigan. My first one here was rushed, hectic, noisy, chaotic, and nice (except for when Guay puked on our bed and we had to go to a laundromat at 11 pm on Thanksgiving to clean the sheets). My second Thanksgiving was a bit more laid back and cold!

This Thanksgiving seems like tradition has set in. The menu was easy to decide upon. I sat with Andrea and we talked about what we “usually” do and decided what would be enough and who is fixing what. I’ve started the preparations, the shopping is done, most of the family will be here… and I’m looking forward to a special day of giving thanks and being thankful for God’s goodness to us.

I keep saying I’m going to write more, and then I never do. Seems like it’s jumps and spurts. I want to keep this site going and get more information on it as well. I just seem to get sidetracked. Don’t know that anyone is really interested in my writing, but I’ll be adding a new collection of short stories (if you are interested). If you enjoy the stories (or any of my other writings on the site), please leave a donation as an encouragement for me to keep writing.

As far as the rest of life, I’m still looking for full-time work, but very thankful for the two small jobs I have right now via ODesk.com. I was on their top 25 technical writers for the month of October and hopeful this will bring me more clients needing quality documentation.

I applied for a job here in Michigan. They would be interested in me, if I was willing to work for slightly more than minimum wage. But I make more on Odesk than that salary would have paid–and would have been twice as busy and working twice as hard!

But this is Michigan:

• There are 10 states in the US facing bankruptcy. Michigan is one of them.
• While national unemployment is at 10.1% (Oct. 2009), Michigan has the highest unemployment rate in the US at 15.1%. This rate does not include people who no longer qualify for unemployment benefits or never qualified for them.
• In October 2009, Michigan reported the highest increase in unemployment (hey, I get to contribute to the November statistic, what will it be?)

Data taken from United States Bureau of Labor Statistics

So why am I thankful and for what?

I am thankful for:

• The God of creation who is my God, and my Lord and my Savior Yeshua HaMashiach
• The amazing salvation I have in Yeshua
• Promises from God that no one can take away
• A wonderful husband who loves God and loves me
• This very special family where God has planted me
• That each month, despite the ups and downs, we’ve been able to pay our bills

I was reading in my Bible this morning and realized that I had not thought a lot about one very special promise from Yeshua.

Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
Matt: 11:28-29

I realized as I reread this that it is not rest for my body, but rest for my soul that I need. Elsewhere, we are encouraged not to be anxious for anything, but to bring all our requests to our Father in heaven. (Phil. 4:6). God promises to meet ALL our needs, but He still wants to hear ALL our requests. And as I lay these in His hands, I do indeed find peace for my soul.

This world challenges our hope. It seeks to choke it out. But for those of us who have placed our hope in the Creator of the Universe, we have an anchor to hang on to in every storm. Our hope cannot be moved because HE cannot be moved.

Blessed Thanksgiving to you all!